Tamil is an extreme optimist living life on her terms. She works as a People Manager in a software concern.
Her love for running, powerlifting, and problem-solving uniquely defines her abilities and enables her to approach life differently.
Her soul work lies in touching others’ lives with love, laughter, and hope by sharing her experiences without holding back. Choosing to live aloud through her empowering words.
Her true stories will motivate you to believe in yourself and prioritize living to the fullest even through your doubts and fears. NOW!
This story was written in response to the prompt “Celebrating the quiet moments of love.”
There are only two ways to live your life: Nothing is a miracle, or Everything is a miracle -Albert Einstein.
I believe in the second option. This enables me to spot wonders in the most ordinary moments.
After all, life is about creating beautiful memories from the tiny moments of love. Every day.
It was 11 pm. As Dad sat down to have his dinner, he noticed me sitting on the couch checking my phone. Before taking his first bite, he deliberately asked me if I would like some.
Although I was in no mood, I nodded YES. My Dad immediately stood up from the chair to feed me without spilling it. I jolted back to the reality of being a middle-aged grown-up woman.
In the profound quietness that followed, he made me realize that I was his princess. And will always be!
The overflowing Joy escaped my full-blown heart through the happy tears 💗
A couple of days later…
After twisting and turning in her bed for a while, she diligently said: “Mommy, I can’t sleep yet. Is it ok if I talk to you for a few more minutes?”
I confidently rolled my eyes in the dark and replied: “of course!”
Her excitement grew leaps and bounds as she continued: “Tell me, mommy, how was your day?”
Her kindness put my solitude to shame. Even in her sleepless moment, she cares to ask about me first.
It never stops to amaze me how kids are so natural at loving unconditionally. The gift of having my own princess!
I secretly wished that moment to last forever!! 😇
Where there is great love, there are always miracles -Willa Cather.
How and where do you find the hidden treasures in your daily life? Please share it in the comments.
If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present -Lao Tzu.
Being present in the moment helps me look forward to the uncertainties in life with curiosity and an open mind.
Time and again, the best blessings of my life are the ones I never planned or expected.
This is why I get EXCITED when things don’t go my way.
I believe it happened for a reason: To pave the way for the greater good!
The higher power is NOW in action!
Putting all my faith in the superior force makes me feel secure today.
The ray of hope finds me even in my darkest moments.
The hard part of this challenge is getting 100 likes for the contest article. I bet Winston knew this was coming when he set it as a criterion to progress to the next phase [insert evil smile from Winston].
A couple of days back, I had only 36 likes for my contest article. That is, after trying everything I could.
Every like took forever to get.
I honestly thought my story would max out at 50 likes.
I dreaded abandoning the challenge mid-way.
I am NOT a quitter. And I don’t fear failure. I kept repeating them to myself in a loop.
I don’t even fear the unknown. So, what’s the name of this feeling trying to eat me? What am I trying to avoid? I pondered. For all I knew, it was a familiar emotion.
After dissecting the thoughts in my mind, I figured:
It was the grand feeling of not being enough for those who may read my story. And its byproduct: The Fear of SHAME.
This realization freed me from lingering self-doubts and insecurities.
I decided to show up to the battle. Only this time, I knew the weakness of my enemy: the ugly face of shame [wicked smile 😈]
Somewhere in the middle of the challenge, the actual game has begun!
Everything is possible for believers
The idea of self-marketing made me feel uncomfortable. Because this would mean reaching out to my friends, extended family, co-workers, and acquaintances who had no clue that I have a secret writer life. So, I saved this strategy for doomsday.
First, I posted my story on LinkedIn and prayed nobody read it. I got 2 likes on the story and a comment from a dear friend who lives in a faraway land.
Not bad at all! [2>0?!]
I reached out to my friends on Medium through my promotional article.
Kristina God, my boot camper coach, was very kind to write an article for me. The best thing about Kristina is that she is always waiting for an opportunity to lend her helping hand!
I reached out to my creative friend Adelina Vasile who brainstormed some beautiful ideas over email and Twitter. She told me to stay active, comment, and endorse others’ work on Substack, and they may reciprocate. This was GOLD!
I read a similar strategy from Substack about how sending cold emails worked to get more subscribers for their newsletters. So I told myself, why not?!
I searched for Substack newsletters with the same niche as mine: Magicbytes. Reached out to them one by one in my comments to their story. I invited them to check out mine.
To my surprise, the responses from the Substack community were great! I was able to make some real connections.
I still had halfway to go. So I dived in headfirst to reach out to extended families, friends, friends of friends, and co-workers.
What happened after that was nothing short of amazing. I received texts with loads of encouragement and support! Too much to blast my gratitude journal and keep me writing for the rest of my life! 🤩
I felt like a brand new person! Being recognized and appreciated by people wanted me to do more! I realized I had a lovely support network, I never noticed.
My fear of shame was washed away by multitudes of praise!
I wrote this article inspired by Marilyn Flower’s story where she points out that “If Tamil can, I can.” And I thought, why not share my experience?!!
It makes me feel I am in charge even when everything else gets out of my control.
My body is my safe harbor. I like to pamper it inside and out.
I wouldn’t be surprised if people recognized me better with face packs on than without 😉
Face packs and hair packs are the best inventions of mankind. Try it out for yourself!
My body rules and leads me during the workout sessions and I dare not steal that joy from it.
Precious jewel, you glow, you shine, reflecting all the good things in the world. Just look at yourself -Maya Angelou.
Self-care for the shining soul
You glow differently when you are in the right place with the right people -Unknown.
Finding like-minded souls here on Medium has been a game-changer for me.
I found my burning passion to live with a purpose: Touching lives through my words.
I thrive being part of the beautiful community here. It makes me want to be more and do more!
Self-care for the tricky mind
The more you love yourself, the less nonsense you will tolerate -Unknown.
Saying NO to drama
Miracles happen when I free myself by saying “NO”. To things and people, that drain my energy and disrespect my boundaries. It frees my mind to focus on greater things.
Choosing my battles wisely
I stopped arguing over trivial things. And explaining myself to everyone.
It took me a long time to figure this out: Most often, people ask you a ton of questions because they want to find answers to their problems through your life decisions.
Make mistakes
I allow myself to make mistakes. Surprisingly, something inevitably happens every time I let myself free:
I perform best, and leave no room for mistakes. The power of mindset shift!
In turn, my confidence soars to great heights.
At the height of self-confidence, I am ok to fail.
In the absence of the fear of failure, I take risks.
This is how my resilience is built! I can start over from the scratch with the same enthusiasm and energy as the first time! My biggest strength!
Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go -T.S.Eliot.
My life would be plain and boring without my beautiful failures and lovely risks! They make me being my best version!
Self-care is not optional
Self-care is a choice, I make every day.
Making an appointment with myself.
Being kind to myself.
Listening to what I feel deep inside.
Showing up and speaking up for myself.
Accepting the way I am.
Self-care is giving the world the best of you, instead of what is left of you -Katie Reed.
How do you pamper your body, mind, and soul? Please share it in the comments.
In 2022, I will continue to thrive and attract energy from like-minded souls to find my purpose. And help them find theirs.
Within two weeks of writing this story, Winston launched Coffee Challenge 3 which pumped me up to start my first newsletter ever on substack! Something I had been wanting to do but didn’t know where to start.
As I defined the niche for the newsletter, I realized my soul work lies in touching people’s lives with love, laughter, and hope. Through my empowering words!
Something I have done all my life, effortlessly! With only good intentions and best interests!
My inspiration for writing comes from my passion to connect with people and share my life experiences without holding back.
The good news is, I only share what I have personally experienced. My stories are designed to reflect my authentic self with brutal honesty. And a tad of light humor.
The universe buries strange jewels deep within us all, and then stands back to see if we can find them — Elizabeth Gilbert.
I think I have found some of mine. And I can’t wait to share them with you and help you find yours.
Are you ready for this new collaboration?
Disclaimer:
In all honesty, I don’t claim to have figured it out all. But, I am open to learning something new about life every day. From my kids, the newborn in our block, the plants, and the bluebirds. Sometimes the lesson comes from my husband too 🤪
I have had bitter experiences with pains, failures, rejections, that are not limited to Family, work, love, or career.
But in hindsight, every hurdle had always presented itself with an opportunity.
A chance for me to fix it for good. A possibility to emerge as a new person. Or simply a sign to stop trying harder.
I understand what it means to be left out and lonely. But it is in that quietness, I found myself.
Time and again, the solutions to my life’s biggest problems have been from the most unexpected places.
Credit goes to my out-of-the-box thinking in difficult times. And the ability to pause and rethink the entire situation differently.
When everything else fails in my life, I get up and Run. I run in the park hard and fast that my mind is so tired to think about anything else. Just kidding!
Running steer clears my mind of all unwanted emotions retaining only what matters the most!
It has helped me be grateful for simple things in life: like breathing!
I plan to write about
How the biggest fortunes in my life humbled me as a person.
How doing simplest help to a stranger makes me feel the most peaceful.
How I almost lost everything I had.
How I manage to be an amazing wife or better than a perfect mom, while embracing the imperfect me!
How we started over in a foreign country with no house to stay.
Oh, the stories are endless…
Life is not meant to be lived perfectly…but merely to be lived. Boldly, wildly, beautifully, uncertainly, imperfectly, magically lived -Mandy Hale.
I am super excited to share my love for writing and stories with you.
[This article was first published on Tamil’s Substack.]
Welcome to my Home…Sweet…Home!
The house may look neat on the outside but prepare yourself to encounter pieces of play-dough or scattered animal toys in unexpected places. The doors and windows bear some creative sketches too.
The primary purpose of my home is to live and let live. The Parents shall live while allowing the kids to make beautiful childhood memories.
I don’t sweat keeping it sparkling clean for the visitors. Given a choice between organizing thoughts versus toys, I’d pick the thoughts, any day!
Sometimes, I surprise myself by doing unplanned things. Like, turning a weeknight into a movie night. Or celebrating a random day with a fudgy chocolate cake.
This helps me to escape the ordinary and makes me be more mindful of the blessings.
By now you may have guessed, I am anything but perfect!
All amazing things in life are not perfect either: Belly-aching laughter, sneaky smiles, naughty winks, overflowing joy, funny moments, heartfelt warmth, and the list goes on…
To pave the way to attain those moments frequently, we need to let go of the pressure and limitations that block our way in the name of perfection.
Our relationships, everyday plans, daily routines, family, career, and future fall into this imperfect circle.
The beauty of life lies in the uncertainty of the next moment. And yet, we focus our energy to make things appear perfect on the outside.
Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment, and shame. -Brene Brown.
How did I become a better-than-perfect Mom?
On my run days, I hop between the legos to grab my shoes and set off to run. when I am back, I follow the trail I created when I left home.
I have no shame in admitting that I choose running over cleaning the house.
When I became a mother, I made a vow to NOT let mommy shame steal my everyday joys of life.
I enjoy making sandcastles on the beach and getting soaking wet in the water parks with my kids. I encourage my kids to play in the puddles and dance in the rain.
My proud mommy moments include watching the kids playing in the park turning their white shirts brown.
There is no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one. -Jill Churchill.
We can learn about life only through play
When my 5-year-old daughter wanted to try indoor rock climbing for the first time, she was super scared. My husband and I took turns to convince her. But she had already made up her mind to quit.
Give up on something she had not even tried once?!
I couldn’t watch her do this.
So, I put on the rock climbing belt myself and climbed to the top. Boy, did I feel anything? Absolutely. I thought I was going to faint and fall flat. But, when I came down, my daughter had already decided to climb, and she did very well for the first time.
After that incident, I have seen her stunning stunts with rock climbing and adventure hikes.
Yesterday, my daughter gave me a lifeline[A line that permanently changed my life forever].
She saw me writing this story that said: “I am not a perfect Mom.” and her response was: “You are the best, Mom. Actually, you are better than perfect.”
BINGO! She nailed it!
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.” -Marilyn Monroe.
So, stop sweating about being the perfect one. Start becoming a real one, instead! Better late than never! 😇
Please share in the comments, how you embrace imperfection in your life? I would love to know more.
New to Medium? Become a member using my referral link to get unlimited access to amazing stories for only $5 a month.
A huge shout out to Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles for this beautiful post about peanut butter, compliments, laughter, and what they all have in common. I enjoyed every bit of it and you should too!
[This article was first published on Coffee times Substack.]
Start living today.
The fun part about me, I take things lightly. I try to live in the moment.
I wake up every morning as if today may be my last opportunity on this beautiful planet. This helps me to stay grounded. And let go of everything that doesn’t feel good for me and others. And breathe freely.
I am incapable of sulking, complaining, or holding grudges.
Even when life throws lemons at me, I make lemonades. With strawberry flavor. Because I like adding colors and flavors. Both to lemonade and life!
Here is the funny part: My unyielding attitude towards life challenges is misinterpreted as escapism and irresponsible behavior by some people.
I used to think, they are tired of me brimming with joy even during the most trying times.
But the truth is that the same people are also the ones who refuse to live in the present. Because they are busy planning for their future.
I can’t help but wonder how they could not render such positivity [their assumption about living longer] towards living now.
Don’t let people who are living their nightmare tell you that you can’t live your dream -Unknown
Here’s what I do every day to fall in love
The first and foremost thing that tremendously helped me with this “NOW” mindset is to stop saving every dime for the future. And start spending some money on what I enjoy doing now.
The money from my paycheck is divided into three different categories: “Spend,” “Share,” and “Save.” My gym membership with a personal trainer, Medium Membership fee, Regular family vacations, Year-end trips with extended families cannot be compromised! I share by giving to people in need and donating to charity. And save the remaining.
I don’t wait until tomorrow to use what I have today! Until a few years back, I saved my special dresses for occasions. Mark my calendar and wait for the day to come. I don’t do it anymore. Now, I pick my special days. The high energy in my days is enough reason to celebrate. On those days, I dress up even though I have nowhere to show up! And click pictures like crazy! Creating delightful memories that can’t wait until tomorrow.
I text random appreciation notes to my friends and family to let them know I care. This alone has done wonders to my relationships. In bridging any gaps and making the bonds stronger than before! ❤️
I can’t wait until tomorrow to let my kids play adults. I involve them in the decision-making process now. The recent conversation with my 7-year-old daughter is something I will proudly wear on my mommy crown. I was in a dilemma about continuing my full-time job in the world pandemic. When asked, My daughter’s re-assuring response made my entire year: “Mommy, you are the best! I think you should continue to work. You can do both!”
Last but not least: Life hides surprises in unexpected places. Sometimes, it shines on me in the form of a rainbow. The bird watching me from my window is a sign, I am being noticed. Every being around me shimmers with so much beauty when I care to look deeply. To unveil the magic around me, I need to live my dreams today like there is no tomorrow!
Like an art, Life gets better when we practice living every day!
Every day is a chance to create meaning in our lives. It is immensely satisfying to spread love and kindness. To know that our existence has a reach beyond us.
To be creative means to be in love with Life -Osho.
I would love to hear from you about how you practice living in the moment. Please share it in the comments.
I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe -Dalai Lama.
Have you ever wondered the whole universe was made for you? The sun, the moon, the planets, the stars, and everything else that takes turns to speak to you in its language. Every day of your life!
To watch over you, to reaffirm you, “You are not alone”. You were never alone!
I don’t take the breeze that wipes my painful tears for granted! The stars that come every night uninvited are a reminder there will always be a tomorrow!
I can sit still and be immersed in the sea. Watching the freshly made foamy waves hit the shore only to dissolve. In endless loops.
It makes me realize the abundance in the universe. The sun doesn’t stop shining brighter because it is just another day. Or the stars don’t reduce in number because nobody counts. The moon stops not showing up because of its glory.
The prosperity of nature is in the endless giving. In offering the species on earth, the best experience of living.
In the silence of our mind, the universe speaks to us.
To be able to hear, all we need is to believe in the Magnificence!
On Dec 31, 2021, one last item in my checklist blinked at me. Ah, the Coffee challenge about “New year resolution and what real problem in my life will I resolve in 2022”.
I wrote an article in the evening and managed to submit it at the last minute. I was lucky to find Ellie Jacobson online at that time and requested her to add me as a writer to the pub “Flint and Steel”. My first submission to the pub was accepted in a matter of minutes.
With only 5 minutes to 24:00. I submitted my published article to the challenge and it got accepted as the last article of the challenge.
Phew! What a way to end the year!
The year started with a sense of accomplishment.
I was not prepared for any of the pleasant surprises the new year held for me though.
The bountiful support from my fellow participants already made me feel like a winner!
And the top writer award from Medium is now history!
I expressed my thank you to the coffee times pub by submitting a second guest post to their substack newsletter.
When I submitted the article, I secretly wished to have my own newsletter someday that would adorn the subscribers’ inbox with positivity. And also help them discover the joy and beauty in their own lives.
I figured the newsletter would be something I could do for the rest of my life. With Passion. Setting my soul on fire!
But there was one problem: I didn’t know where to start.
Beware: Your secret wishes could come true
A few days later, the new coffee challenge announcement was made by Winston which was exactly about how to start our own substack newsletter and build an audience for our niche.
This has got to be the freaking universe listening to my silent wishes, I thought.
Nevertheless, that’s how “MagicBytes”, my substack newsletter was born.
Not convinced yet?
Now, as I was almost done setting up the newsletter, my ambitious self wondered: Would now be the right time to start planning my first book with a bunch of my re-affirming authentic stories?
[ Trust me, if I could write or talk about one thing uninterrupted for hours, it is Positivity.]
This time, the cosmos chose Sharing Randomly to deliver my surprise in the form of her mention.
In her article about the DEP book project, she invited me to participate.
This project expects the participating writer to commit to writing at least one story a month about the top five topics.
The surprise is that…..The first topic listed is: “Positivity”
when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it -Paulo Coelho.
As a believer who identifies herself with extreme optimism, I hope the reason for my participation in this book project is apparent by now!
I believe this is my calling to write my first book. And I want to honor it.
I want to be part of this project that I truly believe will create an amazing impact on the readers’ lives!
My love for writing comes from the urge to spread positivity and sprinkle joy in everyday life. And so I have a reason to believe my words will make all the difference!
It’s not about how much you do, but how much love you put into what you do that counts -Mother Teresa.
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