Your Freedom Is Deep Inside You

July 7, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

Stop looking elsewhere!

Written in response to Ellie Jacobson’s prompt, “Think back to your first memory of independence.” Thank you, Ellie, for the free writing Friday tips and the beautiful prompt!

I was in high school. I remember leaving home on a bicycle to write the chemistry exam on a weekday afternoon.

The school was a few miles away from my home. On my way, in the middle of the route, it started raining. My first thought was to ride as fast as possible to reach my destination. But rain accelerated its pour, beating my pedalling.

The road was steered clear. Nobody else but just me and the rains. I chose to not stop and keep going, no matter what. Riding alongside the rain on my way to independence. To prove to no one but me that I can do anything I want if I set my mind. The best one-on-one conversation I ever had with myself!

The rain never stopped, but my school arrived. Just when I parked my bike, I realised I was soaking wet. I had been out in the rain enough to get every inch of my body wet. I sneaked into the exam hall and finished my exam in the next 3 hours.

It was the first time I broke any boundaries. I was well aware that there might be consequences, but I wanted to literally test the waters to know what it meant to be fearless. The experience was out-of-the-world! With every drop of the pour, my fear of moving to the new house, new school, new friends and all the unknowns washed away. I felt like a new person. I was ready to face life!

To my surprise, nobody in the school or home questioned me about getting drenched. Of course, my friends gave me that crazy look. But that was it. When I brought this up with my mom, she simply laughed at me. Until that point, I have never seen my mom so cool. Maybe she sensed the change in me too.

I don’t remember anything else about that day. All I could remember is that it was an immense feeling to take back my power. To be me, and do what I wish to do.

The Universe was waiting to teach me one of the best life lessons. I am glad I learned. It was also my starting point to living a fearless life ahead!

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What Makes You Think Like That, Mommy?

April 22, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

She asked me with raised eyebrows!

It started when I announced to my husband and 8-year-old daughter my plan to stop repeating the same thing to them 10 times in a row. My inability to grab their attention through their TV was not my fault.

I added I will start writing down things on the refrigerator board like the routine stuff about food, where to find what, etc…Although they heard what I said, their faces looked so blank. Especially the grown-up was very careful to not let out any expression of joy, avoiding my eye contact.

My daughter appeared to be still processing what I said and started with, “Wait, so you will not talk to us?”

Me: Well, not about the routine stuff anymore.

My husband interrupts: Didn’t you hear what she just said? She said she would write down everything on the fridge board and stop talking to us.

My daughter pauses a bit long and continues, “Mommy, but there is not enough space on the board there?”

Me: “That space is enough to tell things like, Food is ready, Playtime, stop watching the tv, nap time, …” and added, “Of course, I will talk for other stuff.”

Now, my husband looks at me in shock. In his mind, I walked over my own promise. Oh yeah, I can read minds too 🤪

My daughter continues, “Wait …wait…what about your office? Will you talk to people there?”

Me: Of course. Remember, this plan is reserved only for you and your Dad for turning deaf ears to me.

Daughter: What about my brother?

Me: I will talk to him.

With a sudden rise in her excitement, she adjusts her seating into the most comfortable spot on the couch. Resting her palms to the sides of her face, she now continues, “So, who else will you talk to?”

Me: To the rest of the world.

[I totally missed the warning sign when she changed position.]

Daughter: Wait, What do you mean?

Me: The entire world except you two loves to listen to me talk.

I shrugged off the smirk that escaped my husband’s poker face.

Daughter: Did the world tell you they were interested?

Me: I just know.

Daughter: What makes you think like that, Mommy?

Me: I don’t know. I…

Daughter: You think like that because you write stories on medium and people read them?

At this point, my husband couldn’t resist laughing anymore.

Me: It doesn’t matter.

Daughter: Actually, Is the whole world even present on Medium?

Me: Ok. I think I made my point clear. For any further questions, ask your Dad.

Daughter: Mommy, you know I can frustrate you so much and make you shout at me. But, if you did, you know that counts as talking too, right?!

That was about 12 minutes of talking about not-wanting-to-talk.

I gave up on my new idea and walked away while she stayed cosy on the couch to enjoy my ego slump on the floor.

Anyway, I wanted to write this story here to let her know the world knows.

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Parenting Is About Ditching the Cute

April 19, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

And embracing the wild…

My toddler son is crazy about animals. Animals that are extinct, living in the farm or zoo, savannah or sea. You name it, he has at least one toy already.

The part that amazes me is that his favourite animal is not a cute sheep or a magnificent elephant. He loves his Hippopotamus to the tee.

He carries a small hippo toy in his hand all the time. Other than spending its time inside his palm, it can be found resting under my pillow or in places you could least imagine in the most unexpected times. It has actually made me believe hippo ghosts exist too.

The scary toy with its wide-open mouth showing its wild teeth is an image you want to avoid. Once you take a look, you can never undo it!

Recently, I watched him play with the toy, poking its teeth with his fingers and holding it close to him. When he left the toy behind to go out, I immediately grabbed it and laughed aloud about what am I missing?! The hippo now comes in handy during my stressful times. It makes me smile through the tough times and worst.

In all seriousness, I am also learning that Parenting is all about ditching what we think is cute and allowing the kids to go wild with whatever they want!

Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder! -Plato.

What is a parenting moment, that made you feel goofy but had a hidden life lesson? Please share it in the comments.

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Be Careful What You Tell the Kids

April 18, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

Another mind-blowing moment with my 8-year-old!

After inviting my daughter at least 3 times to eat her dinner, I started to eat my meal.

She was busy with her craftwork, and when she noticed that I had already started eating, she was surprised.

She said: Mommy, how could you eat before giving me food?

I knew the only way to finish my meal without drama was to divert her mind from the present by pulling out a surprising story.

To create an interest in the story first, I said to her: let me give you a scenario and see if you pass that one. She was now listening.

I said: Ok, you are on the aeroplane with your brother. Now, the pressure inside the plane drops. You know how the oxygen masks will fall from above your seat. The question is, will you help yourself or your brother first?

She said without second thoughts, “Of course, I will help my brother.”

Aww…My irresistible urge to add some life lesson to the current situation was unstoppable.

I continued, “I am proud of you. Your answer is the right thing to do. But sometimes, we need to help ourselves first before we help others. What if you faint while trying to help because you were not wearing your oxygen mask first? So, always put on your oxygen mask first. It is not about being selfish but common sense.”

She looked confused and a bit impatient now.

She shrugged and asked, “Anyway, Mommy, are you planning to serve my dinner or not?”

I replied: “Actually, I am now putting on my oxygen mask.”🤪

She was not expecting that. My pride shone high through the ceiling that night. Little did I know what was about to come!

A few days later…

I called out to my daughter during bedtime and asked her to refill my water bottle.

She said in a loud, clear tone: “Always help yourself first before you help others!”

It was now my turn to be confused. I thought it was probably a proverb or something learned recently.

She giggled and clarified: “Well, it is your quote, Mom. Remember, the oxygen mask?!”

She left the empty bottle with me and walked away with a sense of pride that broke through the ceiling with no limits.

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Have You Eaten The Frog Yet?

April 15, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

I do, every day!

Brian Tracy in his book “Eat that frog” talks about how to finish the most difficult and daunting task, first thing in the morning to avoid procrastinating.

He says, “Eat that big ugly frog first.” And after only 3 years of reading that book, I’ve finally put that into practice and am amazed at the results.

As I sip my first cup of coffee every morning, I pick the ugliest of all frogs on my plate and start marinating it. As much as I am disgusted to imagine touching it, I feel the same way about doing some of the tasks at work.

I used to wait until dusk to push some of the tasks to the next morning only to find myself in a spot several days later, where I can’t prolong any further. The last-minute pressure of getting any work done is not only stressful but also strips the fun out of the process involved in executing it.

I have thought about many creative ways in the past to trick myself to at least get started with such work, but my mind would often arrive at an unplanned destination in a matter of minutes.

So, nowadays I start my day with the most challenging task, I would never pick otherwise. The unperturbed mind space combined with the brisk energy in the morning drives my focus to the task at hand. To my surprise, I finish the job also in very less time.

Starting a brand new day with a sense of accomplishing a tedious work continues to create the ripple effect throughout the day! It leaves me beaming high with confidence and ample energy!

What is the ugliest frog, you have eaten so far and how did you feel as an after effect? Please share it in the comments.

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Ten things you don’t know about me

April 4, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

Yet!

I love prompts like this that make me smile as I write. In other words, my love for self awaits an opportunity always to spill all over the screen! 🤪
I chose home birth to get out and see the world. The nurse who came home to deliver me refused to get paid. Ever since my Dad jokingly calls me “the free kid.” 😆
I got lost in second grade walking over to the next neighbourhood town, losing my way back home. I interrogated the police officer, who found me, to confirm my father’s name and address before I hopped on his bike. He told my parents: You don’t ever have to worry about this one! And they never did 😉
I recall shaving my head at least 5 times up until middle school. I never gave importance to how I looked. Instead, I focused on how I felt. I take happiness very seriously!! The most beautiful people I’ve ever met in my life are the bravest, strongest, and wittiest ( of course, I am on the list too).🥰
I grew up playing a lot of sports. I attribute the best traits in me to my love of games. I learned so much about life only through play. I never exerted as much energy on my studies, although I aced them equally 🥳
I participated in all recreational events at my school like Speech, drawing, writing, dance, singing, and sports. I never once played to win! To me, it was always about showing up and giving my best! I ended up owning a bunch of winner certificates too! 😬
I love all shades of orange! The world would be less colourful without pumpkins. Don’t you think?! 😎
I am a chocoholic. The power of chocolate is so under-estimated. Every chapter of my life has only two episodes: “before” and “after” Chocolate 💗
I derive my hope and faith from the abundance in nature. Nothing makes me feel instantly at peace than the gushing waterfalls, the rushing waves, the silent streams, and the soothing rivers. Yes, I am a water body too 🤪
The best life decision I ever made was marrying my husband by going against all the odds. After 2 awesome kids, I am still able to live the life of my dreams pursuing my passions only because he got my back! 😇

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I Want to Be Just Like Her

March 26, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

100-Word Memoir

At all times!

I touch the pit with my bare hands.

In the deepest dark, my senses are as void as my feelings.

With wet eyes, I struggle hard to swallow the pain.

Breathing in the air relieves me a bit, at least for that moment.

One cannot fall further from this rock bottom becomes my only hope.

Her image of standing tall makes my stance seem very small.

They call her the strongest, the bravest, the most resilient.

I am reminded of what it took to become her.

Sometimes, seeing myself through their eyes prompts me of who I am: The Unbreakable!

This story was written in response to KiKi Walter’s prompt:

View at Medium.com

Your Motivation May Come From Unexpected Places

March 25, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

Never stop looking

It is not the powerful lectures, sparking conversations, or the voluminous self-help books that spring me into action immediately.

The casual unyielding comments and witty one-liners light up my inner fire in no time.

Once found, I keep feeding on that energy forever!

If you want to fly, give up everything that weighs you down -Buddha.

Reclaiming the power from within

As I gasp for breath, I continue to run towards the focal point set before me, swinging my arms back and forth in an upright position. I am totally present at the moment. It creates a beautiful mind space with zero noise from the outside world.

In the eternal silence that follows, my heart beats fine-tunes itself to sync with the rhythm of my legs.

Around the end of the 3rd mile, I always want to take a break. I can hear the stone benches in the park call my name, but I tell myself to not settle for it.

Not giving in to those benches motivates me to keep going mile after mile, passing by them.

I never once sat to take a break in my thousand miles of runs!

Be mindful of your self-talk. It’s a conversation with the universe -David James.

The power of having a like-minded community

On Medium, I needed that extra push to finish up my author bio for the Dancing Elephants Book project. The clock was ticking with the approaching deadline.

The notification blinked on my phone hinting me someone had mentioned me in their story.

As I opened it, I was moved to see Umme Salma’s story.

In her own words: “I would shout out to a few of my fellow writers who are already an established brand, and they always leave their signature marks in their writing.”

She continues to surprise me by listing me among the brilliant bunch of writers, people I look up to in my writing journey.

Wait, did she say, I have established my brand in writing?! [ahem…that was my vanity wondering aloud! 😉]

Her words will be the source of my extra boost forever!!

Thank you, dearest Umme Salma. Your comments always inspire me to write more!

Exactly a week later, Rhea Anglesey’s story touched me deeply. It was a heartfelt read, and I felt honoured to be part of it in a small way.

She added: “I would also like to dedicate this piece to some other inspirational writers who live their lives with empathy and kindness that radiate in their writing and their interactions on this platform.”

She listed me among the most kind-hearted souls of Medium.

Rhea Anglesey, your recognition means a lot to me because I solely write with that purpose.

Surround yourself with like-minded people. Success is a group activity -Angel Alzona.

Accountability breeds response-ability -Stephen Covey

It is legs day at the gym. The first workout is to do an inclined leg press of 220 lbs. Mustering in all my strength, laying in the incline position, I push the chunks of weight against gravity with my legs, grasping the sidebar with my hands for support. I finish the first two sets of 15 reps with dripping sweat and shaky legs.

In the last set, I already had run out of my energy reserve by the 10th rep. I had nothing more left to finish the remaining 5 reps.

I could neither quit halfway nor continue further.

With increasing heartbeats and a perspiring just-turned red face, my body seeks out some desperate magic when my trainer called out, “Come on, Champion!”

That’s it! With the newfound power, I performed the last 5 reps scraping out the last bits of stamina, and stopped not until he said, “Alright, that is enough!”

You must do the things you think you cannot do -Eleanor Roosevelt.

This life is mine alone. So I have stopped asking people for directions to places, they have never been -Glennon Doyle.

What motivates you to get back to action in no time? Please share it in the comments.

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I am Old Enough to Know Better

March 17, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

And young enough to try it anyway

You know the inevitable is staring right into your eyes when you google to find what period constitutes teenage.

The mellowed mind is surprised to find that it is only 13 to 19 years.

Wait, what about the young couple in their mid-20s?! I thought they were teenagers too.

So, not even the new parents in their late 20s? For they are the ones that make me feel distant in terms of the number game.

I am reminded the earth has spun enough to leave me at this spot. The planets moving around did play a part in adding those wrinkles to my eyes?! However, I can now see so clearly all about life, love, and everything else in between.

Anyway, for the tenth year in a row, I bragged to my husband about how I looked just the same. He denied it without hesitation. I never understood him. But today, I stand corrected. Thank you, Google!

I should have known better from the look of my siblings when I traded sleeping over watching movies late at night.

I am finally falling for the schedules and routines. A 6–7 hour sleep is a non-negotiable for me to keep my sanity!

I remember way too many things. I have accumulated so many impressions.
People and their memories are intertwined into my daily existence.

Sometimes, I laugh and talk to myself. It is nothing short of amazing to know that everyone, we meet in our life comes with a reason.

I am able to process many parallel thoughts as I stare at an unknown wall.

I feel empowered to choose my way!

Saying no to things that don’t matter anymore; Embracing the challenges; Re-learning life day-by-day.

Adding new joyful experiences, come what may!

When I am scared, I know the fear is only temporary. After all, I have realised that every feeling lasts only for a while!

Through the thick and thin, I dare to win!

The places on the planet may remember my footprints, long after I am gone!

But the real charm of living lies in the number of people’s lives I touch before I dearly depart!

I am not old enough to cover any pain. Not young enough to dance in the rain. I am somewhere in between.

No matter how far I go, I choose to age gratefully with time!!

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Special thanks to my medium friends who responded with so much love and care for my story: https://medium.com/flint-and-steel/what-should-i-write-about-now-7c4b69c6bee2.

What Should I Write About Now?

March 14, 2022 / trickyqueen / Leave a comment

I am stuck in a maze

This morning, I started writing about marriage. A bit later, I deviated and picked a different topic on parenting from my drafts.

Last week, I had soaked enough in self-reflection. So, I was determined it will not be another article about an experience that involves only me and the lessons learned.

How about the fear of ageing? Oh, wait. That would be me again.

My left brain stops to warn me: You have not much time left to keep switching contexts.

It is Sunday, and I got time only until my son wakes up and my daughter goes into her painting class. That will be precisely 18 minutes of uninterrupted time, I calculate.

Of course, not counting the interference from the TV or my husband. Not including the occasional chores about trying his new coffee or cutting an apple without a peeler.

How about a story on “embracing the difficult changes in life?” the reluctant mind keeps popping up new ideas. Or maybe, subconsciously presenting my current situation.

Alright, just 8 more minutes left, my watch reminded me.

Would the readers like it? My right brain prompted.

What better way to find than ask them?! I wondered.

My dear lovely readers, this post is about finding what you love to read from me. Even better, linking a story from me, you enjoyed the best.

Please leave it in the comments.

Tagging my medium friends: Umme Salma, Adelina Vasile, Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles, Vashni Stories, Liberty Forrest, Author, Ellie Jacobson, Trista Signe Ainsworth, Sharing Randomly, Yana Bostongirl, Lady Dr. Gabriella Korosi, Srini, Gaurav Jain, Donnette Anglin, Nancy Blackman, Kris Bedenian, Eko BP, DMTakeshi, Lisa Gerard Braun, Sally Prag, T Mann, pockett dessert, Sahil Patel, Stephen Dalton, Art Bram, Kristina God, Julie Gaeta, Zaha Hyatt, Indubala Kachhawa, Katie Michaelson, Karen Schwartz, Lanu Pitan, Dr. Preeti Singh, Victoria Gregg, Drashti Shroff, BichoDoMato, Bridie Dillon, Lucia Landini, Marilyn Flower, Rhea Anglesey, Kathryn Eriksen, Toyin Zuleiha, Robert Shaneyfelt, Barb Dalton 🇺🇦, Winston.

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